Alright, I have always gone crazy on folks who have woken me up while I'm asleep. That's just who I am. But when you're a mama, no matter how loco you want to get on someone, it's your job, your joy to get up to take care of baby. Now after 6 months of truncated sleep, even though things are relatively "hella better" then the first few weeks when it seemed like we were waking up every hour or less, I think this sleep schedule is playing with my emotions and my body.
After taking care of a somewhat fussy Soluna by myself for 12 hours, as soon as Benji got home I was ready to pass her off. I tried to breastfeed her to sleep and she wanted to play with daddy so he took her into the living room while I was ready for a much needed nap. And I woke up to her whining in the other room. It hadn't even been an hour. I was ready to bite Ben's head off. RAGE MamaAya, watch out!
He swore up and down that she had just started whining, that he had just changed her diaper and she started, but I woke up with the feeling that he had let her whine the entire time I was asleep and I had gotten no rest. I, in my sleeping state, always want to just grab her and put her to my boob so she can doze off. But this didn't work, especially since I spent the time multi-tasking: shooting Benji the "I'm fucking pissed off that I didn't get any sleep and you couldn't take care of the baby for 30 minutes"-look while Soluna drank at my breast, poor thing (Benji and Soluna). I eventually asked him to take her back and he drove her to Can't Fail to pick us up some dinner. When he got home, he put her in the sling (that he didn't want to find during her 30 minutes of whining) and she was asleep. I ended up getting at least an hour and a half of sleep. Now I feel as "refreshed" as ever, if that means anything anymore. Sigh.
1 comment:
girrrrrrrrrrrrrrl! i feel ya
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